The love life of today, when it ends and why?
October 28th 2008 03:09
The love life of today, when it ends and why?
Today, one in three marriages ends up in a divorce.
It is not a very glorious statistic and it kind of gives us cold feet in terms of making the big step.
Despite it all we still believe in the big day and in the "forever and ever" fairy tale.
We fall in love, we fall very hard and sometimes it hurts.
Saying this, the wedding planners shouldn’t get too worried, as it seems that despite massive
evidence of increased divorce rates, the wedding industry is still doing quite well!
So, back on our feet after a well earned recovery time, the first thing that pops into our head is,
sharing some special moments with someone special again. If some people say the world revolves
around money, one could say that if money seems to be a major concern, love is a bigger one, and
always was.
We cannot stop hoping for the best partner, this special person that will make us feel happy, safe
and grounded. Even if all those feelings shouldn’t depend on someone else’s power it doubles the
effect when it comes from our other half.
Breaking up with someone is more than just ending a partnership. We lose our best friend and the
primary witness of our life at a certain time of it.
We lose someone that probably knows us at the best, and at the worse too!
Can we force someone to hold onto its promise even if this person can no longer keep it?
Researches revealed that happy marriages argue as much as unhappy ones, the differences are that
for the first it is called constructive arguments!
Technically it means that happy marriage's disagreements bring couples together, they work as a
team and use their differences to grow together.
Instead of being driven apart by it, they intersperse their arguments with positive comments and
humour to reduce the tension. Every single marriage on earth could, apart from extreme situations
as violence for example, last "until death pull us apart". What it needs is two people willing to work
together, wanting to stay together and appreciating each other's love, says Mrs Palmer.
Stephanie from Sydney talks about her relationship with her boyfriend: “Josh and I fight. When we
fight it is nothing out of the ordinary, we fight over regular everyday couple problems. The
difference may be with us is that we talk openly and honestly. We communicate every thought and
feeling - then we take the steps to find solutions to the problems. It's a wonderful way for us to learn
about ourselves and each other. Of course there are times when I'm so annoyed that even the fact
that he's communicating everything annoys me. The point is we're honest with each other and tell
the truth - there's a lot of trust between us. We make time and space for each other, time away so
we can be individuals and time together. We are and always will be individuals - we simply come
together to learn from each other, help each other and grow as human beings.”
If only we could all do it!
So if u want to make it work, put your ego in your pocket, it is not about proving the other one
wrong and making your point but show respect to your other half, listen to it, and remember your
willingness to go more than halfway to carry the relationship through difficult times.
Today, one in three marriages ends up in a divorce.
It is not a very glorious statistic and it kind of gives us cold feet in terms of making the big step.
Despite it all we still believe in the big day and in the "forever and ever" fairy tale.
We fall in love, we fall very hard and sometimes it hurts.
Saying this, the wedding planners shouldn’t get too worried, as it seems that despite massive
evidence of increased divorce rates, the wedding industry is still doing quite well!
So, back on our feet after a well earned recovery time, the first thing that pops into our head is,
around money, one could say that if money seems to be a major concern, love is a bigger one, and
always was.
We cannot stop hoping for the best partner, this special person that will make us feel happy, safe
and grounded. Even if all those feelings shouldn’t depend on someone else’s power it doubles the
effect when it comes from our other half.
Breaking up with someone is more than just ending a partnership. We lose our best friend and the
primary witness of our life at a certain time of it.
We lose someone that probably knows us at the best, and at the worse too!
Can we force someone to hold onto its promise even if this person can no longer keep it?
Researches revealed that happy marriages argue as much as unhappy ones, the differences are that
for the first it is called constructive arguments!
Technically it means that happy marriage's disagreements bring couples together, they work as a
team and use their differences to grow together.
Instead of being driven apart by it, they intersperse their arguments with positive comments and
as violence for example, last "until death pull us apart". What it needs is two people willing to work
together, wanting to stay together and appreciating each other's love, says Mrs Palmer.
Stephanie from Sydney talks about her relationship with her boyfriend: “Josh and I fight. When we
fight it is nothing out of the ordinary, we fight over regular everyday couple problems. The
difference may be with us is that we talk openly and honestly. We communicate every thought and
feeling - then we take the steps to find solutions to the problems. It's a wonderful way for us to learn
about ourselves and each other. Of course there are times when I'm so annoyed that even the fact
that he's communicating everything annoys me. The point is we're honest with each other and tell
the truth - there's a lot of trust between us. We make time and space for each other, time away so
we can be individuals and time together. We are and always will be individuals - we simply come
together to learn from each other, help each other and grow as human beings.”
If only we could all do it!
So if u want to make it work, put your ego in your pocket, it is not about proving the other one
wrong and making your point but show respect to your other half, listen to it, and remember your
willingness to go more than halfway to carry the relationship through difficult times.
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Comment by Nevar
Is Why